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I bought tofu once.Apparently squeezing the water out is much more involved than I anticipated, because mine did not have the right texture when I cooked it.
I would recommend the how to Cook everything vegetarian app if you have the iPhone
can you chicken-fry it and smother it with bacon gravy?
How about some not fried options? I love the texture of tofu. And somehow the blandness is appealing - I can add flavor with hoisin, hot sauce, or pretty much any spice.